1000ml of tears ='(

it's really painful inside my heart but i just can't say anything out. stuck in the middle of throat. sucks damn shit -.-
just because of you, within these few days, i almost cry everyday at home!
cry without sound is much more suffer than anything be.
the tears came out with a really sour heart. it's really sour!!! please...
but what can i do? i don't know when you changed your attitude with 180 degree and your not even realised.
it's fine if you say your not. coz no one clearer than me, how you treat me last time!
to build up this relationship is not an easy job you know. i spend all my effort just wanna shorter our distance.
but let's see....i think i wasted my effort. sry dude. :)

那份恐懼、那份害怕、那份擔心、那份緊張 慢慢的浮現了
我真得很害怕面對你 看到你 我真的會選擇逃避
我不知道爲什麽
曾經 不久之前 我有一股衝動想為你做點東西
但看來只能‘想’了 好吧 反正想 應該不會造成你的困擾
應該不會被人講話 不會被人罵

i'll let you know, i can laugh with others but not you. and you should find out the answer yourself.
seriously, I'm lack of security. so....please forgive my childishness .

S1 steamboat party!!

tadaaaaaaaaaa x)

hell yea, long time no update my blog @@

CNY hols is gonna end soon. 

it's a very very soon cuz it's just TMRW!

hahhahah..okay! let's start the topic now!

went to friend's house for a steamboat party! oh yeah~ 

it's really fun but tiring day!! xD

1st I'd not forget to take photos la...

2nd this is the very first time I drink wine!!

wine please! not carlsberg or heineken or wat so ever~

it's a red wine!!! i drunk almost five or six full glasses! ><

hahahhahah xD

some of my friends are really drunk until sot liao~ 

luckily i just felt like sitting on the boat~! @@

we drink until very kua zhang lea ><

#like a boss #like an adult

seriously....we're not exactly 17 yet!!! xp

anyway, cherish this very very very rare chance we have.

some of them are not gonna study their senior3 next year. 

so must enjoy this wonderful 2012 la... hahahah

let's see photos now...

photos will bring you walk into the scene oh yeah!! xD

love you guys!! 12'S2S1 all the best!!!

fulfilled our 2012 with the very joyous laughter!!!

 girls talk =) with the parrot ><

 zhenzhou, zihao and ignatius! =) with the parrot agn!! ><

 MJ!! and the kelefeh zhenzhou~ hahahha xD

 ziyann and zihao!! hahah xD i like this! 

 fennnnnnn~~ best buddy ever~! <3

 wanshin!!! sista ever! xD 

 kangling! rocker plaster! wahahahha...

the one who make me laugh forever!

 fen fen agn >< i like this lea!! hehehhe xD

 five sista forever!!! tadaaaa x)

 i like this also!!! kaixuan and koe!

*koe! you're ugly xp

parrot!!! you always in the photos!!! ><

 girls gang!!! hahahhahah xD oh yeah~

1,2,3,4,5,.......11!!!! oh yeah~!

story end!!! happy CNY everyone!!!  =D

it's a break time.

woah!! time really go fast!

it's the second week of schl life!

and it's really really a busy life.

although it's my spm year, but there're still many tiny little trouble stuff for me to solve.

dude~~ my time almost given to you SCHOOL

now, im officially a tuition girl xD

no friends acc me..so sad.

but it's also good coz i can concentrate! =)

this saturday i gonna write calli agn for schl's competition one.

and this is my past work @ klcc parkson.

nowadays...opps! it's almost everyday i kena lemon from friends!!!

duh~ i hate lemon!!! 

i seriously don't know people can stop their message half way and act like nothing happened!

i'm really really curious and angry on it!!

coz, i really really do wait for your message whole night!

you really make me wanna yell *WTF

okay, please!! no more lemon for me...

all the best for days xD

happy birthday to YOU my darling in primary schl, 

WONG YUIN SHEN!

it's 2012!

oohh~ oohh~ ohho woah~~~

it's a brand new year! teeheheeee xD

and it's also known as the world end year? *lol =B

hmm... saw everyone's status wrote that they were countdown-ing somewhere~ 

it's sooooooo envy la.. i want also!

but..just gather with some of cousins! anyways, it's fun too! ^^

next year, i repeat and repeat..it's my SPM year~

lol xD very ngam cham i knw! :p

now already i feel that pressure! duh~~

hope everything will goes well and awesome!

i must change all my bad attitudes and habits! *trust me :)

next year, i must shout to everyone >>> I'm AWESOME and you knew it! xD

tadaa~ xD

schl reopen~ schl reopen~ SCHL REOPEN!!!

omg :/ it's like so damn envy to those graduates can just leave away from schl~

i want the freedom!

next year~ you know what year?

yea..if you know me. you shud know next year im 17.

im 17 plssss.. ladies and gentlemen, guys and girls~!

stop saying me 13/14/15 already..

i know young is good~ but im not that young~!!! xD

seriously, im really weak on SPM syllabus~

and so.....im still hardly finding a tuition centre!

but none of it still. damn -.-

11 subjects waiting for me !!!!

NICOLE KOK! hwating! :)

A's....wait for me!!!

of coz, i needa reduce my time on using fb.

bye guys... birthday wishes may be less.

 unless i really rmb yours. i'll just SMS you!

okay. good luck guy! xD

YQ11♥

hey dear... im backkkkkk... =)

im really really really tired straight away went for two camps!

*my papa and mama keep complaining :O

hahha...they said : 

just fetch you from YQ and you just walk down from the car 

and go for schl's band camp.. *Lol. xD

Sigh...sorry~

well..let's just tell you how AWESOME YQ forever IS!

although for some other people may felt that all those game 

areeeeee DIRTY!

but it's just fun because of the DIRTY.

lol xD 

this year same group with leelee

opps~ suddenly realize that i din take photo with you~! 

urgh~~~ =(

nvm...next time!

all those mudssssss i think i swallowed some?!

OMG~!

we had camp fire this time and it's the 1st time in this YQ event.

you know how AWESOME! GORGEOUS! WONDERFUL! 

when we put all those lanterns up to the sky together! *applause

it's really really really fun and no words can describe! *my god

it's really really and ever best camp i think!

i'll not miss any of it although next year it's my SPM!!

urgh~ all the best!

thr're some photo!! ♥

juinjuin kent n me♥

juinjuin n me♥

kenny n me♥

ivy n me♥

edward n me♥ (we're ugly :p)

darren n me♥

BOO~♥

oh yeah. i've started!!! im officially a bad girl now!!
hahhaha xD sry guys~~ i've really started all the way long. and i'll never ever let it go!!
sry :B ahhhaa xDD i'll choose to tell ya'll next time la..
weee~~~~~~~ ♥♥♥

yes?! x)

it's the second month of holiday. it's just simply mean that holidays gonna be over and schl life comin' soon. oh damn! schl life comes with SPM! how??!! study now?? no direction at all... all my buddies had finished up their SPM and they're now havin' their freedom life.

although i know without studying now, i've nothing to do. movies? NO. tv? NO. hang out? NO. facebook? NO. twitter? NO. oh damn. all these are boring!!! study is more boring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! urgh~~~ and now. am sick. i donno why. i could describe that this year's was my sick year. almost every month i got sick. no matter mile or serious one. duh...seriously, i hate sick. especially sick when im alone. really really felt lonely!!!

and now. i tried to call everyone at night~ coz i really really cant sleep well. and can say that im very very hyper active. but donno where to use. ahha !! xDDD okay well~~ chit-chat with friends is one of my choice now! =P

sick T.T

oh no!! my lovely readers =) my throat is so damn pain!!!! infection!!! medicine agn -.-
dizzy world~~ once i swollow something even that's a liquid. it's also very very very pain. just like putting an injection on my throat!!! ah!!!! sweet honey also no use... duh @.@

sorry!!! :B

thanks =)

came here and just wanted to thanks my papa and mama for buying me iPhone and Swatch watch.
not happy meal watch already lah.. == this really cost 390 bucks! nice :))

somehow...

today was my last day for 2011 senior1 school's life in TJHS. and also the prizes giving day for all those society. but im not really happy today...

why? i myself also donno. maybe i put too much wishes on 成果彙報 but it made me depressed. or my senior3's buddies are gonna leave this schl and turning for further study. or maybe i really missed you much. i need your hug!!! it's so true that im longing for your hug so long time... i miss your voice! i miss your face! i miss the way you tease me! i miss the way you call my name! i miss you teach me many things! i miss all the part you with me everyday! even if you are there not to talk with me, but just let me see you once for awhile! come back and talk to me!!! :((

and shoooo sudden. i missed my popo and gorgor. i cried for them just now just because i missed them really much~! are you planning to come to my dream world today? i wanted to see your face and tell you some story that happened on me this year. long time never chat with you bro.. i need you! i love you! wish you're happy with popo and gonggong up there.

sorry that i love ya'll :))

release!! :)

successfully...
i released my stress by chatting with friends and watch my favourite movie #forensic III
i released my anger by listening to some advice and forgiving all the people ( this is what i must do before study psychology ) xD

i stopped being a soft girl. now im a big big girl. im happy be with friends. i learn to be patient on every particular thingy. i might became mature because of the guy. he taught me: you must be mature if not some other people will dislike you. you must learn from experience and always be humble. listen to others more than giving ur opinion in some time.

thks anyway. but don't no why. i love this song #count on me - bruno mars, just because its lyrics formed for friends. its a really nice song. nowadays i used to love bruno mars very well. of course i'll not forget my friend show lo.

jiayou NICOLE KOK!

wii~~ :)

wii wang wang~~ i used to be a strong and happy girl nowadays... ahha donno why? :O fast fast!! left two more subjects to go and it's gonna end the exam!!! wohoo~!



tetapi hor... my smile has dissapeared as long as i saw the things you post. what you mean huh? i need to live under your control isit? i need to listen all of your instruction to the right of life isit? you thought you're the king of malaysia?! eff. you're misunderstanding on everything. but you just like to put one hand or leg in this situation. who tell you that you're havin' this qualification? oh ya! forgotten that you're a king.brainless...huuuuhh...~~

just calm myself in a really cool situation and tell myself. yes, you're really did something bad. but what for im angrying with you? no matter you're right or wrong / what people told me about you / it's a fact or joke... i'll still take you as a friend. although we may not meet everyday... know who am i talking about huh~!

有些人講話就是沒經過大腦 還是腦殘 腦袋秀逗吼？ 隨便拉 反正你就是奇怪 奇怪到不可理喻 但你都不知道科技的發達嗎 人算不如天算啊 你就是做是不夠謹慎 才會百密一疏 自己懂自己干了什麽是拉 我不再計較 因爲你不值得

給自己一個微笑 =)

exam-eve :X

lol. for me, exam-eve always meant to be a restful day. let our mind stop thinking and having a fully rest before walk in the exam hall. but donno why :/ this time's exam keep ruin me all the day. the nervous feeling cant stop, well, but im not distracting by anything~ actually nowadays, there's a person keep making me 'unlike' him/her. i'll not mention the name, maybe someone will know it.

know wat? i hate when tht fella said 'don care'. i hate when tht fella just treat me good when he/she needed me to do something. and he/she will not appreciate for it. i hate when he/she just noticed me as a passbyser. i hate when he/she just remember me when he/she needed me, without that, he/she'll just leave me alone. goodness!!! in summarization, I HATE YOU, dude~

u taught me to be mature girl, but u're just represented u're not and u're childish~ LOL xD

apologize :S

1st. thr's really a misunderstanding situation now... and so im truly giving an apologize to THOSE.
[ maybe write in chinese will be more clear ]

其實 我並沒有惡意 我真的沒有討厭你們 只是純粹開玩笑 發洩一下罷了 如果覺得我這個玩笑開太大 我真得很抱歉 我那時只是純粹的喜歡他 欣賞他 沒別的意思 而且事情過了這麽久 也沒有必要這麽在意了 雖然說現在大家都好像陌生人 但我不希望這個誤會一致的蔓延下去 我真的沒有要讓大家討厭你們 我也沒有跟大家說你不好 但最讓我疑惑的是 我從很多人口中得知 你們在事發之前 就有在我背後說了一些‘話’ 我之所以才會對你們開始有那麽一丁點的反感 我真的不是要讓你們難堪 可以不要把事情嚴重化嗎

換個角度來想 我那個時候 只是以喜歡一個人的角度 去吃醋一個人
我真的沒有惡意 再次聲明

再説 我真的沒有到處唱衰你們 真的沒有
但我聽説的是 你們一直說我
或許這也是個誤會
很抱歉 讓你們這麽不爽
事情 真的沒有你們想得這麽複雜 拜托 真的沒有惡意
你們要怎樣都不管我的事 我會祝福你們
對不起產生這麽大的誤會

今天 我的一個朋友 開了這個話題
感覺 把話講清楚 整個人輕鬆了 不會再有任何猜疑 揣測 甚至不信任
由始至終 我都沒有討厭你們 話説，開始是有點不開心 但都過去了
事情真的過了很久 久得我都忘記了……

最後 我還是要謝謝我的那個朋友 告訴我這一切 謝謝 =)

hello? =)

MR AND MRS AND MS. i hate ppl criticize behind of me. if you want, shoo in front of me lah. don *poppe poppe poppe* and just gossiping thr. i think im really mature to tolerate this kind of friendship from now onwards. *applause* bwahahaha... once agn. im really an open-handed person lah..believe me xD it's up to you for making me angry or embarrass or frustrated.... im not gonna have a conflict with you. am now a BIG BIG girl. *whispering* bluek~! xP

no trust in my life =D

謝謝你的美好

 
因為我們知道 這天終究會來到
所以不計較 只要彼此可以過得更好
當初愛的是你 當我哭時也是你
在我的身邊 讓我嘗到有被愛的感覺

謝謝你的美好 我絕對不會忘掉
雖然那滋味 慢慢地 慢慢地 淡掉
今晚我們見面 算不算最後一遍
答應自己不流眼淚

我們在散步 我們在殘酷 心裡早預估
誰要說出口 誰要當兇手 你還是我
我們的全部 所有的全部 只要再一步
就能夠解脫 就能夠擁有 得到自由

請你不要 cry like this is a surprise
哭出來 only make things 更難捱
我的愛 並沒有改 是時間作怪
Girl you know that,right？

嘿 你把你眼淚擦乾
嘿 你把你腳停下來
one more step
that's all that we have left

謝謝你的美好 我絕對不會忘掉
雖然那滋味 慢慢地 慢慢地 淡掉
今晚我們見面 算不算最後一遍
答應自己不流眼淚

我們在散步 我們在殘酷 心裡早預估
誰要說出口 誰要當兇手 你還是我
我們的全部 所有的全部 只要再一步
就能夠解脫 就能夠擁有 得到自由

oh damn! ^.^

1st!!! an announcement here!! just the thing i wrote before. still rmb what? that most nervous event i've attended. the results post on the board today~!!! hooray, we got in to the final round successfully!!!! seems like other societies celebrate happily. but why i don even have any feeling? huh...hmm...wondering!! maybe everyone thought and predicted that we're bad and wont get in to the final round. so just, congrats to all my partners lah.. :)

2nd!!! foolish day for me today! sucks life nowadays -.- i donno who am i to you? brother? sister? friends? or just a stranger? ah~!! everytime i said i wanna give up but everytime i lose myself. oh fcuk! what am i doing? you said you dislike i rude, i try chg my attitude. but you're the one who always made me feel liked ' oh damn shit! '....

just SORRY lah... donno why? just feel like wanna apologize to someone but donno who.

stupid girl jotted.

weekend? :)

ehy ehy~! today's my buddy friend, EUNICE birthday!!! sweet 16th lah... xD hope she will happy all the way with her boy boy JOSAIAH**

 

uh-uh! what's going on? i really do care you much dear. don make me upset lah... should i accept your apologize?? mmm-hmm...*considering. im fear that you'll re-do your mistake agn, and i'll angry agn. what for i spend my anger on you? worth it or not? terrible lah me >< so let me think over whether should i forgive you. 

suddenly miss my popo so damn much :(( i need your advise on everything. uh-huh~ how are you there? rest in peace huh! :))

lost girl jotted.

words in my heart

i must admit that im open-handedness enough in every situation. not perasan* lah...  am i too patient and open-minded on everythings made you misunderstanding that you can do whatever you want? am so sry. just the thing i saw today, made me angry you completely and maybe should say HATE? wth -.- don you think twice before you did that brainless thingy? oh damn. yes. you don have a brain. so sorry my dear... don even ask me to forgive you. as when the phrase ' I HAVE TOTALLY GIVE UP ON YOU ' pop out from my mouth, you're definitely dead. just saw a photo extremely suits to describe the situation of me and you. see that>>>

 

you guess what? the pig is you and im angry behind you. don act innocent in front of me. im just truly mad right now. stand faraway from me!!!!!!!!!!!!! stupid dumb dumb. don simply abuse my patience. everyone has different limits. and you're not deserve to use all. and now, im gonna think about isit worth to have a 'blast' with you......

abandoned girl jotted.